Message of the day from Jollilads: Durex is not 100% safe

Yet another piece of history was carved into Coach Arasu’s CV and Jollilads Arsenal record books when a semi-final berth was booked via a heart-stopping/heart-thumping/heart-pounding 4-3 penalty shootout win over SRC. This quarter-final clash was also marked by the introduction of orange juices, with Kok volunteering his finesse at squeezing oranges, and the return of NUS striker/tag-board abuser Fu Chengwei.

With the gameplan set to apply as much pressure on SRC whenever they were in possession (achieved by a greater force divided by a smaller area), and the focus being on individual behavior on the field, Jollilads looked to take the game to SRC from the onset. Coach Arasu’s tactical plan almost paid off within the first 10 minutes when Steven Lam took 2 shots from dispossessing SRC. As the game progressed, the tempo was likened to a sinusoidal wave with either side not being able to find the penetrative ball in the final third. The closest both sides came to opening the scoring was when an intentional header from Daowei back to Tianci rolled past the keeper’s eyes/body/legs/feet, however, showing his supreme speed of thought, Tianci scampered back to prevent the ball from rolling into the net. The first half was also marked by Kok whispering to Andrew that peeling oranges was indeed his favourite past-time.

A few changes were made during half time when Coach Arasu sacrificed pace for speed when substituting Zul for Durex Khai. However, it was SRC who dominated the opening exchanges of the second half when Tianci was called into action, first, to attempt to save his first penalty of his ‘illustrous’ career (which he duly failed, not that it made any difference, the post came to the rescue) and second when he sprang across to his near post like a spring to keep out a header, drawing the ‘ohh’ and ‘ahh’s from the onlooking spectators. And true to the call of the wind, SRC took the lead when a bullet shot from the edge of the box flew in via the post, leaving Tianci stranded and gasping for air at the sheer might and velocity of the ball. If the fairytale ending was really ending, Jollilads weren’t listening or reading the script, when they again raised their game and attempted to equalize. Boosted by the introduction of Chengwei and Kok (he finally stopped peeling oranges), Jollilads raised their game. It was almost rewarded in the 89^th minute when a cross by Winston was just a teeny weeny bit too high for the man mountain to glance it into the open net. While heads/bodies/ears were down, hearts weren’t, as the final corner of the game from Sudi found Winston unmarked, who finished with aplomb, sparking wild celebrations amongst fans, coaches, and Uncle Sam alike, who proceeded to ‘tau-pok’ Winston even though he was complaining of chest pains and the slight distortion of his ‘you-know-what’. That proved to be the final kick of normal time as Jollilads were taken to penalties the second time in this season’s FA cup.

With Tianci hoping in desperado to finally break his duck and save a penalty, and the looks of excitement still cast on the faces of the Jollilads, Sudi ran up to take his first spot kick, sending the keeper the wrong way. This trend of hitting the back of the net was followed up by Fuhang, Aaron and Chris, until Khai stepped up (with the odds of scoring and sending us through to the semis: 1.00, and the odds of missing: 100) and added to his collection of misses when he placed the ball past the left post. With all the pressure in the world, galaxy and solar system placed on the shoulders of the final SRC taker, who would equalize if he scored and send Jollilads through if he missed, he took a long run up, saw the cheeky face of Tianci, had Kok peeling and squeezing oranges in his mind, and missed, sending cheers and volcanoes erupting.

Through the progress of the FA cup this year, we have shown grit, spirit and team togetherness in grinding out results when needed, words of encouragement was heard at all corners, available to every ear. Thus, with the ‘luxury’ of sitting on the bench and hoping to hear Coach call out my name, I hereby remind everyone of us that the road ahead of us is tough, no doubt, we’ll have to dig into ourselves and raise our game to another level, but like every other saying, the ball is round. It’s time to stop hoping and start believing, time to stop wishing and start visualizing. We can do it! Jalan Besar, here Jollilads come!

A few pointers to take note, Kok’s fingers have been severely bruised by the oranges he abused. Winston has scored in every round of the FA cup thus far. Tianci still likes to shout ‘away away away’, and sings it during bathing and murmurs it in his dreams. That’s all for now, stay tuned to more!

Lineup: ‘Away Away Away’ (GK), Rafi (Kok), Daowei, Aaron, Chris, Manfred (Chengwei), Feroz, Zul (Khai), Fuhang, Sudi, Winston

Unused subs: Tim, Andrew, Nadeem, Kennard

Cannot be used subs: Weiming, Jerome

Match Report written by Kennard Gan